I have gotten so many emails in the past couple of months from fellow teachers that have been so incredibly complimentary and sweet. Emails that remind me of why I started this blog in the first place. But along with those emails, many have asked the question, "How do you do it all? How do you find the balance? The time? How do you manage blogging, creating, teaching, kids, and family?"
The answer is so simple.
I don't do it all.
I struggle with balance. Life with 2 kids is hard. Working is hard. Keeping my house clean is a tiny nightmare. Blogging has fallen off the priority list, as has creating teaching resources for TpT. I would be lying if I said that it doesn't bother me. I feel a tinge of jealousy when I see other teacher bloggers that seem to be able to do it all--and then again, maybe appearances aren't what they seem. Maybe they have the same exact struggles that I do? The thing about blogs, Facebook, and instagram is that people usually share all the good things. Nobody really shares the hard things.
So, hard things. Here we go.
I just want to keep it real with y'all. And reality is, I still love teaching. But..my classroom isn't as tidy and "picture perfect" as it once was. For example, it's a daily struggle to keep my teaching table cleared off. I *may* or may not be guilty of shoving things in cabinets and random drawers to make myself feel better. Shoving things in random drawers and cabinets actually causes a new set of disorganization problems, but... I don't worry about it until I need to worry about it. I don't work on school stuff until midnight anymore. I have a laundry mountain waiting for me at the end of each week. I don't exercise. I stuff myself with cookies, candy, and junk food when I'm stressed--so...that's pretty much everyday. My family goes out to eat for dinner way more than I'd like--because, after a long day of teaching, I'm just way too tired to cook anything. And I SURE don't want to clean it all up! I run my dishwasher nearly everyday, because I don't want to hand wash any dishes. Call me lazy... I don't care! I haven't had a hair cut since before my son was born. That was about 8 months ago. True fact. I forget to pay my bills, even though they are due the exact same day EVERY single month! (I mean, really, what is the matter with me?!) So, the truth is, I'm kind of a mess. I'm a little scattered. I need to be more organized. After nearly 9 years of teaching, I'm still figuring things out. I think that's normal, but maybe it's not. I don't know. I need a popsicle.
I love my babies. But I feel guilty because there are times when I focus more on my classroom than on them. I worry about the time I already lost with my little girl when she was a baby because I was busy blogging or creating. I don't want to regret time lost with my family due to technology. Our family suffered a great loss this past month, and I've realized that family is the most important thing. So, even though I certainly don't "do it all"--I know that I have the people I love around me, and I'm doing the best I can.
I'm off to work on that laundry mountain. And also, pay that bill that was due on the 4th. Thank the Lord for Halloween candy and baby snuggles.